She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize