you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
