WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
