Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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