Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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