I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
