I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I deserve this hangover.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
