i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
