Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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