You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
