I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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