Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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