I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
