Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Randomize
