i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Randomize