We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
