Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
