I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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