Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
