i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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