exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
