Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
