All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
