Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
