Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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