You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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