It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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