we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I forget how to act sober
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize