I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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