Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
