I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
