You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
