My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
