Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
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