fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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