It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
