this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
