No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Randomize
