you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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