We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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