Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
