yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
