And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
