Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
