id be glad to
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
