Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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