it was like eating out sand paper
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
