hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize