So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We just shotgunned beers for America
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
