Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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